The Brown Noser

Issue date: 10/24/08 Section: Campus Life

Media Credit: Fraser Evans Mound is shown above, not graduating.

Scott Mound '08 is many things: a budding poet; a moderately skilled athlete; a triple concentrator in English, Political Science, and University studies; an asset in a game of flip cup. But one thing he is not is a college graduate, unlike the former students he calls "those quitters in my graduating class."

"There are just some things in life you can't rush, you know?" Mound told the Noser. "Why put a date on the end of college? Things will happen as they happen-it'll all work out in the end." Adjusting to his classes in his ninth semester here at Brown, Mound has been a fixture on College Hill since the first term of the Bush administration.

"I voted for Kerry back in '04 when I was 19," Mound said. "Man, I can remember it like it was yesterday. I'd just gone to see Finding Neverland the night before, and I was torn up inside. Good thing 'Hey Ya!' came on my Walkman, or I'd have been crying all the way to the polling booth."

Standing in line for a quesadilla at Jo's, Mound said he had begun his college career wanting to be a writer, before shifting gears toward becoming a doctor, an astronaut, a full-time philanthropist, and a Double-A baseball player. "I'm not really sure yet-I'll have to sort things out," Mound said of his current plans, suddenly making his way over to the salad line. "But I've got other things on my mind right now, you know? I'm going abroad in the spring, and next fall I'll be gunning for a higher leadership position in UCS. You've got to be ambitious these days to get ahead, right?"

Mound's decision to remain on campus hasn't been well-received by everyone at Brown. One of his concentration advisors, Professor Roxanne Bamarsky, says that Mound isn't mindful enough of the inordinate amount of money he's spending to stay in college. "I'm not even sure the Brown community wants him here anymore," she said. "He thought he'd be greeted this fall as some larger-than-life legend, but I think people see him as more of a nuisance."

"He's well-intentioned, but I just don't think he gets it," said Molly Keystone '11, a member of UCS. "He keeps talking about staying in student government and making things the way he always thought they should be, but at some point he's just got to let us take over. There really must be things he could be directing his money and attention towards other than sticking around here."

As for Mound, however, he's content to stay where he is. "I made IvyGate the other day," he told the Noser, plunging his fork into his Caesar salad and taking a swig of Odwalla Superfood. "Apparently they thought it was funny that I passed out on a RIPTA bus after spending six hours at the Sigma Chi progressive party. But you know what? I'm happy about who I am. Those guys should just grow up."

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