Go Find Yourself Another All-Purpose Scapegoat!
The Economy
Issue date: 4/24/09 Section: Business
A frustrated motorist blamed me for his flat tire this past Thursday, and on Monday a museum curator found me culpable for the poor attendance at his "Perspectives on Clitoral Symbolism in 17th Century Tapestry" exhibit. Then I heard an air traveler blame me for her delayed flight out of Buffalo; later that same day some Twittering pre-teen even cursed me because her cell phone battery was dying.
Why aren't you blaming God anymore? Did that fall out of fashion? You fickle people should try blaming your kid who was born after the expired condom broke, or even fall back into your racist stereotypes, but for heaven's sakes (that's another good one) don't use me as an all-purpose scapegoat. Yo-yos and rubber bath toys are portable, and neo-conservatism or "oppression of the global south" might betray to others some intelligence on your part.
And from a practical standpoint, don't keep blaming me because I will only suffer more under the weight of the blame and fall into deeper depression. Cut me some slack or I'm going to end up hanged. Go to pinatas.com and get yourself a custom piñata to take it out on something else-you don't even have to insert the tilde, and they're cheap too.
Why aren't you blaming God anymore? Did that fall out of fashion? You fickle people should try blaming your kid who was born after the expired condom broke, or even fall back into your racist stereotypes, but for heaven's sakes (that's another good one) don't use me as an all-purpose scapegoat. Yo-yos and rubber bath toys are portable, and neo-conservatism or "oppression of the global south" might betray to others some intelligence on your part.
And from a practical standpoint, don't keep blaming me because I will only suffer more under the weight of the blame and fall into deeper depression. Cut me some slack or I'm going to end up hanged. Go to pinatas.com and get yourself a custom piñata to take it out on something else-you don't even have to insert the tilde, and they're cheap too.
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